1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:03,799 Oh, come on, it's not a big deal. Half of my class have got one. 2 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:06,239 You're not getting a fake ID, Georgie. You're not old enough. 3 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:07,319 Yeah, that's the point. 4 00:00:07,320 --> 00:00:08,919 It's not about drinking or going out or anything... 5 00:00:08,920 --> 00:00:11,999 Oh, no, I'm sure you're just desperate to do jury service. 6 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:13,639 It's just some gigs and festivals 7 00:00:13,640 --> 00:00:15,720 and venues that... It's a no, Georgie. 8 00:00:17,440 --> 00:00:20,119 Sweetheart, just be thankful you inherited a youthful appearance 9 00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:22,079 from my side of the family. 10 00:00:22,080 --> 00:00:23,399 Both your dad's sisters 11 00:00:23,400 --> 00:00:25,160 have foreheads you could strike a match on. 12 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:28,759 AMANDA SIGHS 13 00:00:28,760 --> 00:00:30,479 That should be our house. 14 00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:32,599 Life is so unfair. 15 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:34,159 Is that a lot of money for a house? 16 00:00:34,160 --> 00:00:36,439 It is around here, Manus. 17 00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:38,119 Why's the writing so small? 18 00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:40,319 It's not. Are your eyes OK? 19 00:00:40,320 --> 00:00:42,879 Yes, thank you. 20 00:00:42,880 --> 00:00:44,399 It's their font that's the issue. 21 00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:46,319 My eyesight is actually perfect. 22 00:00:46,320 --> 00:00:48,520 Ugh, come on, we're going to be late. 23 00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:53,159 Oi! What are you doing with my daughter?! 24 00:00:53,160 --> 00:00:55,359 Oh! I'm so sorry, so sorry! 25 00:00:55,360 --> 00:00:56,839 Mum! I didn't... So embarrassing. 26 00:00:56,840 --> 00:00:59,199 Sorry! Second-hand embarrassment, Mum! 27 00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:00,999 You just walked away! You're so embarrassing, Mum. 28 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:02,519 How do you not know your own daughter? 29 00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:04,519 Oh, my God! 30 00:01:04,520 --> 00:01:06,679 BLOWS WHISTLE 31 00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:08,319 Come on, boys. Half-time. 32 00:01:08,320 --> 00:01:09,799 Let's get a drink. 33 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:11,359 Sorry, Amanda, what was it again? 34 00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:12,719 Flat white, whole milk. 35 00:01:12,720 --> 00:01:15,079 Great. Honestly, head like a sieve. 36 00:01:15,080 --> 00:01:17,439 Flat white hole, flat white hole, flat white hole... 37 00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:19,879 Don't get too settled, we're going to grab a team photo 38 00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:20,920 if we get a minute. 39 00:01:22,200 --> 00:01:25,119 What? Someone needs some glasses there! 40 00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:27,079 No, actually, Mal. 41 00:01:27,080 --> 00:01:30,239 For your information, I have a biological age of 33. 42 00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:33,159 Really? Yeah. Not my words, those of Marie Claire's website. 43 00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:36,679 Oh, yeah! And my last eye test showed 20-20 vision, so... 44 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:37,959 Yeah, but when was that? 45 00:01:37,960 --> 00:01:40,279 Cos your eyes fall off a cliff in your late forties, you know. 46 00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:42,719 That's nonsense. It's just a kind of... 47 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:43,839 ...misty haze. 48 00:01:43,840 --> 00:01:45,039 It's rather lovely. 49 00:01:45,040 --> 00:01:47,159 It's like watching a 1950s film. 50 00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:49,399 Great news! I've just got another booking! 51 00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:50,919 Hey! Oh, Fi! 52 00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:52,919 This one's a spaniel called Daniel. 53 00:01:52,920 --> 00:01:54,559 I already walk a Pug called Doug 54 00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:56,799 and a bull mastiff whose balls are massive, 55 00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:58,079 which is almost the same thing, 56 00:01:58,080 --> 00:02:00,359 so it's like a proper business now, guys. 57 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:02,839 I mean, it's got a logo and a name. 58 00:02:02,840 --> 00:02:05,999 I'm Utterly Barking. 59 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:07,479 Indeed you are. 60 00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:09,239 I've even found meself a little van. 61 00:02:09,240 --> 00:02:10,519 Nice! What kind? 62 00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,759 Don't know. White one. Four wheels. 63 00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:14,479 Don't know much about cars. 64 00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:17,399 I saw it on Facebook and they said I could see it today, so... 65 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:19,559 I could give it a look, if you want. Really? 66 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:21,680 Oh, yeah, Mal loves a bit of vansplaining. 67 00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:26,839 Because he's always... 68 00:02:26,840 --> 00:02:30,079 Yes. No, we got it. Yeah... Perfect. 69 00:02:30,080 --> 00:02:31,719 SHE SIGHS 70 00:02:31,720 --> 00:02:34,119 Right, I've got a latte for Amanda. 71 00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:36,399 No, Anne. Flat white whole. 72 00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:38,399 Flat white whole! 73 00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:40,399 And with that, a nickname was born. 74 00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:41,839 Very sorry. 75 00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:43,519 I'm all at sixes and sevens today. 76 00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:45,399 It's fine, I'll drink it to be sustainable. 77 00:02:45,400 --> 00:02:48,839 Oh, talking of drinking, Georgie was just asking about fake ID, 78 00:02:48,840 --> 00:02:50,839 so something else to keep an eye out on. 79 00:02:50,840 --> 00:02:52,959 Great. Now I feel old. 80 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:56,359 Well, no, Fi, because it shows they're young, 81 00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:57,879 too young to drink, 82 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:00,439 which means we're parents of young children. 83 00:03:00,440 --> 00:03:01,759 We're young parents. 84 00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:03,679 Oh, right, so do we need ID? 85 00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:06,479 Well, I don't see Darius having a need for that any time soon. 86 00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:08,999 He's still all about Roblox... Aww. ...and chocolate milk. 87 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:10,879 I mean, look at that little cherub. 88 00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:12,079 Yeah, exactly. 89 00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:14,559 Such a sweet, sweet little boy. 90 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:15,879 CAMERA CLICKS There you go. 91 00:03:15,880 --> 00:03:18,479 CHEERING 92 00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:19,560 Let's go! 93 00:03:20,480 --> 00:03:21,679 Can I give you a lift, darling? 94 00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:23,359 Hate to think of you going by bus. 95 00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:24,999 I don't go by bus. I walk. 96 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:27,879 Aww, poor thing. 97 00:03:27,880 --> 00:03:29,999 A lift would lovely. Thank you. 98 00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:31,120 Oh, erm... 99 00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:34,399 Do you think you could drop me at the opticians? 100 00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:37,520 Hmm... Men don't make passes at girls who wear glasses. 101 00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:39,600 Mummy! 102 00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:43,720 Hold on, I haven't got my seat belt on! 103 00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:52,640 Where'd I park the bloody thing? 104 00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:58,159 So, Elspeth's house is officially on the market. 105 00:03:58,160 --> 00:03:59,199 Dead cat lady? 106 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:00,759 Yes, I'm sure that's how she'd... 107 00:04:00,760 --> 00:04:03,079 HORN HONKS Jesus! 108 00:04:03,080 --> 00:04:04,479 Mummy, that was so close! 109 00:04:04,480 --> 00:04:05,799 No, plenty of room. 110 00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:07,359 Erm... 111 00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:10,879 Yeah, er, it's not exactly cheap, but, actually, 112 00:04:10,880 --> 00:04:12,399 given the floor space... HORN HONKS 113 00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:15,879 Car! Relax, I saw it. 114 00:04:15,880 --> 00:04:17,119 Yeah... 115 00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:18,560 So, yeah, I'm just, er... 116 00:04:19,560 --> 00:04:22,320 ...wondering if there's a way for me to... 117 00:04:25,520 --> 00:04:26,879 ...secure the investment... 118 00:04:26,880 --> 00:04:28,559 Are you angling for a loan? 119 00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:29,599 No, not at all. 120 00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:30,960 Mummy, nothing like that. 121 00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:34,239 I wasn't planning to pay it back. 122 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:36,159 Well, that sounds really tempting! I meant more... 123 00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:37,800 Oh, my God! 124 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:39,920 Erm... 125 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:43,119 There's the possibility of you gifting me 126 00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:46,079 some of my inheritance early, you know? 127 00:04:46,080 --> 00:04:47,439 Erm... 128 00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:49,199 Ahead of your, er... 129 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:50,319 Death? Well... 130 00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:52,959 Oh, sorry, darling. All my money's tied up in the house. 131 00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:55,640 Oh. Looks like you're going to have to wait for me to croak. 132 00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:58,239 Christ! 133 00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:00,359 How have you made it this long? 134 00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:02,479 Mummy, can you just pull over? I'm going to walk from here. 135 00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:04,079 Fine. Your funeral. 136 00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:06,479 That's exactly what I'm trying to avoid. 137 00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:08,119 There you are. 138 00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:09,719 Thanks, Mummy. 139 00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:11,239 Absolute maniac. 140 00:05:11,240 --> 00:05:13,720 Jeez, this is wrecked. 141 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:15,919 Yeah, don't buy it. 142 00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:17,399 I like it. 143 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:18,719 Are you serious? 144 00:05:18,720 --> 00:05:21,839 Yeah. It reminds me of the one that me dad used to drive. 145 00:05:21,840 --> 00:05:24,719 His had a little rust patch just like that. 146 00:05:24,720 --> 00:05:27,999 Yeah, most buyers don't normally go for those, as a rule. 147 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:30,119 Hmm. He used to take me out on his rounds with him. 148 00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:31,719 He was a delivery driver. 149 00:05:31,720 --> 00:05:33,559 He used to let me take off the handbrake, 150 00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:35,199 put the hazards on when he was making a drop. 151 00:05:35,200 --> 00:05:37,439 Lot of happy memories in that van. 152 00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:39,439 Listen, I get the nostalgia, I really do, 153 00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:43,359 but trust me, you do not, under any circumstances, 154 00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:45,479 want to buy a van in this sort of condition. 155 00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:47,359 60, 80, 1, 156 00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:50,200 20, 40, 60, 80... 157 00:05:52,240 --> 00:05:53,440 Right, all done. 158 00:05:55,240 --> 00:05:57,479 So, the test shows you're a 1 in both eyes. 159 00:05:57,480 --> 00:05:58,559 Oh, that's great. 160 00:05:58,560 --> 00:06:00,239 Such a relief. Thank you so much. 161 00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:02,319 No, that means you need glasses. 162 00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:03,599 But you said "plus". 163 00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:07,399 "Plus" means good things like A or Platinum or... 164 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:08,959 Well, everything. 165 00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:10,599 Except plus size. 166 00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:12,559 Actually, no, even that now. 167 00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:15,239 It's just how we express degrees of long-sightedness. 168 00:06:15,240 --> 00:06:16,719 I'm long-sighted? 169 00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:17,999 It's a perfectly normal result, 170 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:19,759 especially as you're heading towards 50. 171 00:06:19,760 --> 00:06:21,359 I'm not heading towards 50! 172 00:06:21,360 --> 00:06:23,439 Oh! I had your date of birth down as 197... 173 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:24,559 Yes, I know what I put. 174 00:06:24,560 --> 00:06:27,039 I wouldn't call that "heading towards 50." 175 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:29,359 That's like turning onto the M4 at Chiswick and saying 176 00:06:29,360 --> 00:06:31,119 you're heading towards... 177 00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:32,799 Well, I'm not sure where the M4 ends up, 178 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:35,759 but it's probably a very long way away and not worth worrying about. 179 00:06:35,760 --> 00:06:36,799 I think it's Swansea. 180 00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:38,719 Exactly. There you are, then. 181 00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:41,999 Maybe take the prescription and just have a think. 182 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:43,040 OK. 183 00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:54,640 Where are the glasses? 184 00:06:55,840 --> 00:06:58,319 Mum, could you do us a favour? 185 00:06:58,320 --> 00:06:59,359 Oh, yes, of course. 186 00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:01,359 I was just standing here ironing while making a lasagne, 187 00:07:01,360 --> 00:07:02,639 thinking, "What else could I do?" 188 00:07:02,640 --> 00:07:03,719 Cool. 189 00:07:03,720 --> 00:07:04,999 Could you get me an ID? 190 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,040 Oh, my God... 191 00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:11,439 My little boy? Where's my little boy gone? 192 00:07:11,440 --> 00:07:12,599 What's the hurry to grow up? 193 00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:14,719 What do you need a fake ID for anyway? 194 00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:16,079 Is it for drink? 195 00:07:16,080 --> 00:07:17,439 Are you a drinker now? 196 00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:18,719 Or is it drugs? 197 00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:19,919 Are you hooked on drugs?! Mum! 198 00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:22,319 I don't think a drug dealer would ever ask me for my ID. 199 00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:23,519 Anyway, I don't want a fake one. 200 00:07:23,520 --> 00:07:26,559 One of them Government ones to prove I'm still 16. Why? 201 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:28,759 I keep getting charged full price at the water slides. 202 00:07:28,760 --> 00:07:30,559 They say I look 18. That's all. 203 00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:32,159 SHE SIGHS 204 00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:33,359 That's such a relief. 205 00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:36,399 You are, you're such a good boy. I'm sorry. 206 00:07:36,400 --> 00:07:38,239 God, you gave me a right scare there. 207 00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:41,479 Why would you do that? Why would you worry me like that? 208 00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:43,399 Are you trying to give me a heart attack?! What the hell?! 209 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:44,999 Mum! Sorry, I'm so sorry. 210 00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:46,919 I'm sorry. I'm just feeling a little bit emotional today. 211 00:07:46,920 --> 00:07:50,279 I... I didn't sleep very well last night. Erm... 212 00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:51,799 Yes, that's absolutely no problem. 213 00:07:51,800 --> 00:07:53,519 I will send off for the ID in the morning. 214 00:07:53,520 --> 00:07:56,639 That's absolutely no problem. OK. Thank you. 215 00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:58,760 Mum, why are you ironing the pasta? 216 00:08:01,760 --> 00:08:04,759 Where did... Oh, no... 217 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:06,080 Oh, no... 218 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:17,599 Morning. 219 00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:18,640 Hi. Ah... 220 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:21,439 Oh, they suit you. 221 00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:24,639 Yes, you would say that. They're £300. 222 00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:27,239 Oh! OK, er... 223 00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:29,279 Drrrr... Erm... 224 00:08:29,280 --> 00:08:30,839 Yeah, OK, cool. 225 00:08:30,840 --> 00:08:33,599 Try those. Similar style, just without the flex hinges. 226 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:34,999 OK. £90. 227 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:36,079 OK. Yeah? 228 00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:38,040 There you go. OK, thank you. 229 00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:41,679 Oh, wow! 230 00:08:41,680 --> 00:08:43,599 OK, maybe they all look good on you. 231 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:47,399 Yes, very good. I'm sure you're the king of commission. 232 00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:49,120 Oh, no, I'm not on commission. 233 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:52,280 OK, well... 234 00:08:55,280 --> 00:08:57,599 OK, I will take those. Yeah? Thank you. 235 00:08:57,600 --> 00:08:59,279 Lens fitting takes about five days, 236 00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:01,159 so they should be ready by the end of the week. 237 00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:03,039 Oh, OK. Well... 238 00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:04,559 What do I do till then? 239 00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:07,439 Oh, erm... Some ready readers might tide you over. 240 00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:11,520 Ah! Yeah, not the height of fashion, but if anyone can pull them off... 241 00:09:15,520 --> 00:09:17,480 Oh, er... Can I get your number? 242 00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:20,640 Erm... 243 00:09:21,680 --> 00:09:23,999 That's very... And we'll call you when they're in. 244 00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:26,239 Ri... Yes, of course. Yeah? Yeah. OK. 245 00:09:26,240 --> 00:09:29,279 Yeah. Erm, it's 07... 246 00:09:29,280 --> 00:09:31,319 Yeah, it's just like me dad's van. 247 00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:32,999 You're going to love it, Dells! 248 00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:36,439 There's a steering wheel, and a couple of these sun things, 249 00:09:36,440 --> 00:09:37,919 and a few of these... 250 00:09:37,920 --> 00:09:40,359 Yep, yeah, I've seen a van before. 251 00:09:40,360 --> 00:09:43,679 Look, as long as Mal is happy, then I'm happy. Well, actually, Dells, 252 00:09:43,680 --> 00:09:46,119 I was... Oh, you're breaking up, actually, Della! 253 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:49,079 Right, let's get the pedal to the metal! 254 00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:50,319 You mean rust. 255 00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:53,839 ENGINE STARTS Ooh, yeeees! 256 00:09:53,840 --> 00:09:56,079 ..Newcastle United over the last few seasons... 257 00:09:56,080 --> 00:09:58,079 Hmm... ..in the Premier League, there have been... 258 00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:01,759 Tuner's screwed. Seems to be stuck on some sports station. 259 00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:03,959 Oh, I suppose I should name her. 260 00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:05,879 Me dad's was called Samantha. 261 00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:07,719 Maybe I'll call her Mandy, after Amanda, 262 00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:10,359 cos she's sort of, like, looking down on everyone. 263 00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:11,399 HE SNIGGERS 264 00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:13,759 All right, well, there's a bit of a knack to getting these in reverse. 265 00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:16,159 You need to lift the collar, push... 266 00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:18,200 Oh-ho-ho! 267 00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,399 Are you sure you've never driven one of these? 268 00:10:21,400 --> 00:10:23,199 Yeah. Maybe it's in the genes. 269 00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:25,119 All right, let's go. 270 00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:27,239 HORNS HONK 271 00:10:27,240 --> 00:10:29,119 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Fi, what's that? 272 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:31,359 Me?! He came out of nowhere! 273 00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:32,999 I was indicating! 274 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,839 Yeah, I know, but we're in a white van. 275 00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:38,999 Us white van drivers have got a bad enough rep as it is, all right? 276 00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,639 Go easy on the horn, huh? 277 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:41,960 All right, Mal. 278 00:10:52,840 --> 00:10:55,039 Mummy! Darling! 279 00:10:55,040 --> 00:10:56,599 Fancy seeing you here. 280 00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:57,639 Well, I live here. 281 00:10:57,640 --> 00:10:59,759 And don't you look a picture. 282 00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,799 In this? You look lovely in that colour. 283 00:11:01,800 --> 00:11:02,959 What is happening here? 284 00:11:02,960 --> 00:11:05,799 What do you mean? Why are you being... nice? 285 00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:07,679 Can't a mother pay her daughter a compliment? 286 00:11:07,680 --> 00:11:09,919 Yes, but, historically... Look, actually, 287 00:11:09,920 --> 00:11:12,519 I was thinking about your idea about that house down the road, 288 00:11:12,520 --> 00:11:14,959 and I think you might be onto something. 289 00:11:14,960 --> 00:11:16,039 Mummy, are you serious? 290 00:11:16,040 --> 00:11:18,239 Well, it wouldn't hurt to take a little look around, 291 00:11:18,240 --> 00:11:22,119 and so I've booked us a viewing at 4pm this afternoon, if you're free. 292 00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:23,239 SHE GASPS 293 00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:24,639 Yes! Amazing! 294 00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:25,919 Oh, Mummy, what happened there? 295 00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:29,679 Oh, just little light brush against a "keep left" suggestion. 296 00:11:29,680 --> 00:11:30,839 Do you mean "sign"? 297 00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:33,399 No, the blue ones are just suggestions. 298 00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:34,440 Bye, darling. 299 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:42,079 So with GCSEs imminent, 300 00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:45,079 we just want to take you through a bit of exam prep, 301 00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:48,159 which we like to call the three Ps of revision - 302 00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:50,920 plan, prepare and, erm... 303 00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:54,239 I should've made some notes... PHONE VIBRATES 304 00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:57,399 Erm... So, let's make a start with planning. Plan. 305 00:11:57,400 --> 00:11:58,919 It's so, so important 306 00:11:58,920 --> 00:12:00,599 they have a timetable. 307 00:12:00,600 --> 00:12:03,879 Er... If they haven't had time to put a timetable together, 308 00:12:03,880 --> 00:12:06,279 and sometimes they will claim they don't... 309 00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:07,719 Oh, those are interesting. 310 00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:10,519 Thank you, Mal. Where'd you get 'em? New place on the high street or... 311 00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:11,719 ...1996? 312 00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:14,319 They're temporary until my designer frames are ready. 313 00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:17,199 And the handsome late-20s guy in the shop 314 00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:20,199 seemed to like me in glasses very much. 315 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,479 Ooh! Obviously, cos he'll be on commission... 316 00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:24,639 Not on commission, actually, Mal. 317 00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:26,559 Just liked what he saw. 318 00:12:26,560 --> 00:12:27,600 A lot. 319 00:12:29,960 --> 00:12:30,999 Oh, my God! 320 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,479 AMANDA CHUCKLES 321 00:12:32,480 --> 00:12:33,679 It's him! 322 00:12:33,680 --> 00:12:35,919 Should he be texting me, like, directly? 323 00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:37,839 Absolutely not. He's a serial killer. 324 00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:39,120 What's he say? OK... 325 00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:42,119 "Hi, Amanda. 326 00:12:42,120 --> 00:12:44,159 "Finley from Optitrue here. 327 00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:48,519 "Your glasses will be ready to collect tomorrow. 328 00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:51,639 "I look forward to seeing you again." 329 00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:53,759 Ohh... OK! 330 00:12:53,760 --> 00:12:56,879 He, like, totally wants you... 331 00:12:56,880 --> 00:12:58,439 ...to go and collect your glasses. 332 00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:01,839 Yeah, cos if that's his A-game, then he's no... 333 00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:03,240 Oh, Jesus, what's his name? 334 00:13:04,720 --> 00:13:06,559 Oh, God, your man. 335 00:13:06,560 --> 00:13:07,719 Your man with all the women. 336 00:13:07,720 --> 00:13:08,879 James Bond? Tiger Woods. 337 00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:10,839 No, no, he's a lover. 338 00:13:10,840 --> 00:13:14,199 Er... His name is the word for someone who, erm... 339 00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:15,719 SHE SIGHS Honestly, I don't know what's wrong 340 00:13:15,720 --> 00:13:17,559 with me at the moment. 341 00:13:17,560 --> 00:13:20,679 My memory's terrible, I can't concentrate on anything, 342 00:13:20,680 --> 00:13:22,799 I've not been sleeping great, which doesn't help either, 343 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:24,599 and then my emotions are just all... 344 00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:27,759 Oh, Anne, do you think it's like, you know... 345 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:29,279 ...menopause? 346 00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:31,639 Don't be ridiculous, Abigail. 347 00:13:31,640 --> 00:13:33,199 We're years from all that. 348 00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:34,719 My sister's started at 42. 349 00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:36,719 And I heard that, like, one in ten women get it early. 350 00:13:36,720 --> 00:13:39,399 No... Yeah. Can't be the menopause. 351 00:13:39,400 --> 00:13:40,479 Like Amanda said... 352 00:13:40,480 --> 00:13:41,640 One in ten, Anne. 353 00:13:43,040 --> 00:13:46,159 And, to be fair, you've always aged quite quickly. 354 00:13:46,160 --> 00:13:48,439 Yeah... It all fits, now I think about it. 355 00:13:48,440 --> 00:13:51,199 I mean, menopause definitely affects recall, I heard... 356 00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:52,759 ...from my friend Marcie Jane Cameron... 357 00:13:52,760 --> 00:13:55,119 ...in July, at the ballet, seat D4. 358 00:13:55,120 --> 00:13:59,079 Yeah. No, my sister had it all - brain fog, tears, memory, the works. 359 00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:00,999 Oh, Anne... What did she do? 360 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,159 HRT. But it changed her life, so it's worth looking into. 361 00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:05,999 Yeah. Do you want to write that down, Anne? 362 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:08,039 Yeah. Yeah, thank you. 363 00:14:08,040 --> 00:14:09,080 Were there any questions? 364 00:14:10,040 --> 00:14:11,959 Casanova! Oh, my God. 365 00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:13,879 Sorry. 366 00:14:13,880 --> 00:14:14,919 Yes. 367 00:14:14,920 --> 00:14:17,839 DOGS BARK Come on now, enough! 368 00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:20,600 What happens in the park stays at the park. 369 00:14:22,160 --> 00:14:24,239 It all boils down to the coaching, and until you 370 00:14:24,240 --> 00:14:26,559 know how to accept that, we ain't never going to see any improvement. 371 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:29,519 Do you know what I mean? They're getting paid a fortune! Fortune! 372 00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:31,199 All right, mate. I'm sick of it, Adam. 373 00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:33,479 Calm down. Week in, week out, these guys get paid million of pounds... 374 00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:35,880 I mean, if anything, the issue's in the boardroom. 375 00:14:39,240 --> 00:14:40,359 Look, Fi, I hear what you're saying, 376 00:14:40,360 --> 00:14:42,719 but I don't think we can actually lay the woes of an entire season 377 00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:44,079 at the manager's door. 378 00:14:44,080 --> 00:14:45,519 Yeah, but he's taken the money! 379 00:14:45,520 --> 00:14:47,719 I'm sorry, but if you're happy to take the pay cheque 380 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:48,879 and the silverware, 381 00:14:48,880 --> 00:14:51,799 you have got to hold your hands up to some sort of negligence. 382 00:14:51,800 --> 00:14:53,559 OK, we can't say he's negligent. 383 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:55,799 I can say what I like, Alan. Free speech. 384 00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:58,119 It's free speech! 385 00:14:58,120 --> 00:15:00,839 Yeah, OK, thanks, Fi from Harlesden there, with your free speech. 386 00:15:00,840 --> 00:15:02,920 Anyway, keep your football calls coming in. 387 00:15:04,560 --> 00:15:06,959 Well, I'll, er, give you a few moments. 388 00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:08,559 Mm-mm. 389 00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:11,679 Ooh, such a lovely place. 390 00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:13,079 Yeah. 391 00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:15,039 Bags of potential. 392 00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:16,080 Bags. 393 00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:20,999 Well, I think we should have a catch-up tomorrow 394 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:24,879 and have a little chat about what might be arranged. 395 00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:26,439 THEY CHUCKLE 396 00:15:26,440 --> 00:15:27,719 Mummy... 397 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:29,879 Oh, oh! Yes. Almost forgot. Yes. 398 00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:31,839 There is a little thing you could do for me. 399 00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:33,239 Oh, sure. Yeah, yeah. 400 00:15:33,240 --> 00:15:35,239 You might get a letter from the police 401 00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:37,799 about a marginal speeding offence. 402 00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:40,479 If you could just tick the little box that says that you 403 00:15:40,480 --> 00:15:44,240 were behind the wheel, that would be a real weight off my mind. 404 00:15:45,720 --> 00:15:47,359 What? 405 00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:50,399 I was just saying, you might get a letter from the police... 406 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:52,039 Yes, I heard what you said. 407 00:15:52,040 --> 00:15:53,719 It's the tiniest thing. 408 00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:58,599 It's just that, you see, my licence is pretty much full up... 409 00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:00,839 Ah. ..points-wise, and you haven't got any... Right. 410 00:16:00,840 --> 00:16:02,679 ...so if you could just tick that little box, 411 00:16:02,680 --> 00:16:04,880 I think that would be easiest for everyone. 412 00:16:06,480 --> 00:16:07,839 But you were driving. 413 00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:09,399 Yes, but it's only paperwork, really. 414 00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:12,199 Well, no, it's me lying to the police 415 00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:14,839 and getting two points on my licence. 416 00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:16,759 I think you'll find it's three, darling. 417 00:16:16,760 --> 00:16:19,679 Or you could go on one of those courses, as it's your first offence. 418 00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:21,079 I haven't committed an offence. 419 00:16:21,080 --> 00:16:22,399 That's the spirit! 420 00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:24,559 I mean what is 10mph? 421 00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:27,559 They say that 40 is the new 30... 422 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:29,999 ...but I guess they just forgot to tell the speed cameras. 423 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:33,559 Yes, right, Mummy, the cameras. Yep. 424 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:35,519 They will have a photo of you at the wheel. 425 00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:37,519 Oh, I don't think that'll be a problem. Of course it will. 426 00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:40,039 You are a woman in your 70s and I am self-evidently not. 427 00:16:40,040 --> 00:16:44,159 Just this week, I had a man in his 20s practically drooling over me, 428 00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:45,200 for God's sake. 429 00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:48,559 I don't think anyone's going to believe I'm you. 430 00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:49,879 Well... 431 00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:51,679 ...let's just sleep on it, shall we? 432 00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:53,600 Seems we both have a lot to think about. 433 00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:56,599 FELICITY SIGHS 434 00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:57,800 Such a lovely house... 435 00:16:58,960 --> 00:17:00,920 DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES 436 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:07,079 Well, it's been mainly the memory issues, yes, 437 00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:09,519 but there has also been some mood swings. 438 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:11,959 Just the other day, I told one of the twins that, 439 00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:14,439 "Mammy could really use some space right now." 440 00:17:14,440 --> 00:17:16,039 God, I don't know what came over me. 441 00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:17,239 I know they're no longer toddlers, 442 00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:19,919 but they shouldn't have to be listening to language like that. 443 00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:22,719 OK. Well, I do have some results for you, 444 00:17:22,720 --> 00:17:24,799 based on the urine test and those initial bloods. 445 00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:25,919 Right. 446 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:27,600 Yes, and, erm... 447 00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:31,999 ...is it a woman's issue? 448 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:33,799 In a way, yes. 449 00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:34,919 Anne... 450 00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:35,960 ...you're pregnant. 451 00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:42,839 Darling. 452 00:17:42,840 --> 00:17:43,880 Mummy. 453 00:17:45,040 --> 00:17:46,159 What's the score? 454 00:17:46,160 --> 00:17:47,839 It's 3-0 to the Eagles. 455 00:17:47,840 --> 00:17:49,639 Oh, dear. 456 00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:50,839 No, we're the Eagles. 457 00:17:50,840 --> 00:17:53,079 FELICITY GASPS Oh, yes. 458 00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:56,559 So, erm, have you had the chance to think any more 459 00:17:56,560 --> 00:17:57,959 about my little request? 460 00:17:57,960 --> 00:18:00,439 Yes, Mummy. I got my letter. 461 00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:01,599 Thank you. 462 00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:05,559 And whilst I'm a firm believer in helping out family members 463 00:18:05,560 --> 00:18:06,960 however I can... 464 00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:11,880 ...I downloaded the photo and, well... 465 00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:18,799 So, yeah, I think that puts that little debate to bed. 466 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,720 I'll say it does. Heh. 467 00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:23,439 So you'll take the points? 468 00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:25,679 What? Well, that could easily be you. 469 00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:26,799 That's a pensioner! 470 00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:27,959 How dare you?! 471 00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:30,839 What?! Mummy, it's a statement of fact! Look! Excuse me. 472 00:18:30,840 --> 00:18:32,719 Oh, Mal. OK, sorry, do you have a moment? 473 00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:34,679 Can you just tell me what you see there? 474 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:36,360 Oh, no... 475 00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:42,600 What are you going to do? Take the points or do the course? 476 00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:44,680 See? 477 00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:50,120 I just did a course. 478 00:19:03,680 --> 00:19:04,719 Anne! What happened? 479 00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:06,919 Oh, well, I fell off a chair... 480 00:19:06,920 --> 00:19:10,000 Oof. ..cos, oh, yes, also, erm, a bit of news... 481 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:14,759 ...er, turns out I'm pregnant, so, yeah. 482 00:19:14,760 --> 00:19:16,759 Er... Oh, my days! 483 00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:19,999 Wow! Wonderful news, Anne! Congratulations! 484 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:21,599 Yeah, that's amazing! 485 00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:23,999 Oh, thank you. Yes, a bit of a shock. 486 00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:25,199 Well, we could all be pregnant, Anne! 487 00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:26,359 We're all young enough to be pregnant. 488 00:19:26,360 --> 00:19:28,359 Just cos some of us choose not to be doesn't make us any older 489 00:19:28,360 --> 00:19:30,080 than the people who are. That's not how it works. 490 00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:32,399 OK. 491 00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:34,519 Congratulations, Anne. I'm very pleased for you. 492 00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:35,640 Thank you. 493 00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:42,479 Stupid font's so small. 494 00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:43,640 PHONE CHIMES 495 00:19:52,080 --> 00:19:53,679 Oh, hey! Hi! 496 00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:55,999 Hi. Picking up, right? That's right, yes. 497 00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:57,160 And what was the name? 498 00:19:59,040 --> 00:20:01,279 It's... I'm joking. 499 00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:02,599 Like I'd forget that face. 500 00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:03,840 Take a seat, Amanda. 501 00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:06,480 They're right here. 502 00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:10,239 Just check the fit, if I may. 503 00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:12,360 Mm. 504 00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:16,959 Yeah. 505 00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:18,000 How does that feel? 506 00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,799 Very nice. Thank you. 507 00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:21,879 Great. 508 00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:24,399 Yeah, just check if they're level. Look at me. 509 00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:26,000 OK, yeah. 510 00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:29,320 All... 511 00:20:30,720 --> 00:20:32,639 ...all looking good? 512 00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:34,480 Yeah, real good. 513 00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:37,719 Er... 514 00:20:37,720 --> 00:20:43,439 Look, this is hugely unprofessional, but I was wondering... 515 00:20:43,440 --> 00:20:44,679 Follow me. 516 00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:48,799 Yeah, so those are for you, and any problems, you know where to find me. 517 00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:50,039 Right. Yeah? 518 00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:51,080 Yes. 519 00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:53,520 Yes, I do. Ah... 520 00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:05,359 Amanda! Hey, there, Mumma! 521 00:21:05,360 --> 00:21:09,439 Oh, look at you, you're absolutely glowing. 522 00:21:09,440 --> 00:21:11,439 I was, er... I was just bleaching my moustache. 523 00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:12,639 Aww. 524 00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:16,639 I was just passing and I wanted to drop by a little pregsent. 525 00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:18,280 A pregnancy present. Oh. 526 00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:23,319 Oh. It's for stretch marks. 527 00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:26,079 I've never had to use it ever, but it's supposed to be really great. 528 00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:27,559 Er, thank you for this. 529 00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:30,119 My cousin uses this, actually, on her scars. 530 00:21:30,120 --> 00:21:32,799 She reversed a pedalo into a bloom of jellyfish a few years... 531 00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:34,679 I just got propositioned... 532 00:21:34,680 --> 00:21:35,839 ...by the guy at the opticians. 533 00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:37,519 By the guy in his 20s? Yes. 534 00:21:37,520 --> 00:21:39,879 Are you sure you didn't get hold of the wrong end of the stick there? 535 00:21:39,880 --> 00:21:41,079 Yes, Anne! 536 00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:42,839 AMANDA SCOFFS Quite sure. 537 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:45,839 The only stick-getting-hold-of was... 538 00:21:45,840 --> 00:21:50,719 ...him wanting me to get hold of the... 539 00:21:50,720 --> 00:21:53,319 ...right end of his s... 540 00:21:53,320 --> 00:21:54,839 No, Anne. 541 00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:56,079 No, don't do that. 542 00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:57,399 Do your normal face. 543 00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:59,439 Why? What did I...? What did I...? Anne, no! 544 00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:02,359 You don't have the monopoly on being young and fertile, you know. 545 00:22:02,360 --> 00:22:06,439 Don't look at me like I'm some dried-up husk. 546 00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:07,839 Come on. Come on, I'll prove it. 547 00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:09,399 I'm just in the middle of... No, you're not. Come on. 548 00:22:09,400 --> 00:22:10,519 Grab your coat. OK. 549 00:22:10,520 --> 00:22:11,839 Come on, before they close. 550 00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:13,039 I'll be back in a minute! 551 00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:14,640 Anne, wipe it off, it's gross. Mm. 552 00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:19,280 Right, come on. 553 00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:21,240 Ugh! 554 00:22:24,360 --> 00:22:26,799 Did somebody call the RA-Fi? 555 00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:29,279 It's like RAC, but... me. 556 00:22:29,280 --> 00:22:31,519 Yeah, I forgot to top up the bleeding coolant, didn't I? 557 00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:33,199 Hop in. I'll take you to Halfords, mate. 558 00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:34,440 Ah, nice one, Fi. 559 00:22:39,160 --> 00:22:41,280 Whoa... Oh, sorry. 560 00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:44,239 Ooh, got a live one there. Do you want half? 561 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:46,079 No, thank you. All right. 562 00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:47,279 Can I turn that down? 563 00:22:47,280 --> 00:22:49,879 Oi, oi! Lucky saddle! 564 00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:51,079 What the f... 565 00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:52,159 What? 566 00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:53,279 You can't say that! 567 00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:56,279 But that's what you say when you see a lady on a bike. 568 00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:59,399 You shout "lucky saddle" for good luck. 569 00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:00,919 It's like seeing a yellow car. 570 00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:02,759 My dad used to say it all the time. 571 00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:05,199 No, no, no. OK, turn that off. 572 00:23:05,200 --> 00:23:06,239 What? 573 00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:07,599 ENGINE AND RADIO STOP 574 00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:10,959 That's... not why your dad was saying "lucky saddle". 575 00:23:10,960 --> 00:23:14,639 He was implying that the saddle was lucky because of where it was. 576 00:23:14,640 --> 00:23:16,600 On a bike? No, where on the rider. 577 00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:18,679 SHE GASPS 578 00:23:18,680 --> 00:23:20,359 Oh, my God. 579 00:23:20,360 --> 00:23:22,239 He was a white van man. 580 00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:24,559 Well, I mean... How did I fucking miss that? 581 00:23:24,560 --> 00:23:27,359 Well, you were a kid and, you know, it was a different time. 582 00:23:27,360 --> 00:23:30,559 In the '90s, even the greatest dads could be a bit... 583 00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:31,719 ...stuck in the '80s. 584 00:23:31,720 --> 00:23:35,079 I mean, I'm a white van man and... we're not just like that any more. 585 00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:37,439 Well, I bloody am! Look at me! 586 00:23:37,440 --> 00:23:40,199 Yeah, I mean, you could tidy up a little bit 587 00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:44,159 and think a bit more about how you behave on the road. 588 00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:46,759 Maybe it's just in my DNA, though. 589 00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:48,919 All them childhood memories. 590 00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:51,159 Stick me in a white van and this is just what I become. 591 00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:52,679 Hmm. 592 00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:54,039 Do you want me to drive? 593 00:23:54,040 --> 00:23:55,360 Yeah. 594 00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:07,159 ENGINE STARTS 595 00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,159 HORN HONKS 596 00:24:09,160 --> 00:24:11,680 Oi! I was indicating, you wanker! 597 00:24:15,960 --> 00:24:17,080 Maybe it's the van. 598 00:24:22,480 --> 00:24:23,679 I don't know why we have to do this 599 00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:25,679 because the shop's going to be closed soon anyway. 600 00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:27,119 It's barely 5:30. 601 00:24:27,120 --> 00:24:29,199 Now, listen, you're going to go in there and browse the glasses. 602 00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:30,399 I actually have 20-20 vision. 603 00:24:30,400 --> 00:24:31,439 Don't show off, Anne. 604 00:24:31,440 --> 00:24:34,359 I will then enter, approach Finley, and you will bear witness 605 00:24:34,360 --> 00:24:37,999 to a very handsome young man 100% hitting on me. 606 00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:40,319 OK, damn, he's leaving. That's him. 607 00:24:40,320 --> 00:24:41,360 Oh! 608 00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:45,359 He IS a very handsome young man, yes. Yes, I did tell you that. 609 00:24:45,360 --> 00:24:46,479 Awful young, though. 610 00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:49,479 Well, I don't see it Anne, but then maybe I'm not prejudiced like you. 611 00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:51,359 Oh, come on. 612 00:24:51,360 --> 00:24:53,479 He's being picked up by his mum. 613 00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:54,839 Well, we all see our mums, Anne. 614 00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:57,319 There's not an age when you suddenly stop seeing your mum. 615 00:24:57,320 --> 00:24:59,679 Oh... Actually, I, erm... 616 00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:01,440 ...don't think that's his mum, Amanda. 617 00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:05,679 What...? 618 00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:08,280 Do you think maybe he has, erm... a slight... 619 00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:12,759 ...kink for the older lady? 620 00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:13,959 Anne, listen to me. 621 00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,439 If you want me to be godmother to your unborn child, 622 00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:17,519 which you do... Mm-hm. 623 00:25:17,520 --> 00:25:20,439 ...this... never happened, OK? 624 00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:21,480 Mm-hm. 625 00:25:27,080 --> 00:25:30,119 Anne, move it, now. 626 00:25:30,120 --> 00:25:32,280 Anne, I just said I didn't want to talk about it. Yeah. 627 00:25:34,360 --> 00:25:36,399 What the hell...? 628 00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:38,479 Busted. I said we should sit inside. 629 00:25:38,480 --> 00:25:40,319 What do you think you're doing?! 630 00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:41,959 It's one gin and tonic. 631 00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:43,759 And they're only singles, so it's not that bad. 632 00:25:43,760 --> 00:25:45,239 Did your mum get you a fake ID? 633 00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:46,559 No, she went all Amanda about it. 634 00:25:46,560 --> 00:25:48,559 Well, what... What is that supposed to mean? 635 00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:49,799 How'd you get served? 636 00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:51,520 Drinks, ladies! 637 00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:54,279 Oh, shit. 638 00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:55,799 Darius! 639 00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:57,079 You little fecker! 640 00:25:57,080 --> 00:25:58,599 Well done, guys. 641 00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:00,440 Way to upset the pregnant woman. 642 00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:03,119 What?! MEN CHEER 643 00:26:03,120 --> 00:26:04,279 Oh... 644 00:26:04,280 --> 00:26:05,639 Had you not...? No, not yet. 645 00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:06,680 Right. 646 00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:11,880 Big brother! 647 00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:21,559 FELICITY GASPS Darling! I was just... No. 648 00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:23,479 It's a no to taking your points. 649 00:26:23,480 --> 00:26:26,079 And I realise it's going to cost me any help with buying the house, 650 00:26:26,080 --> 00:26:27,120 but the fact is... 651 00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:30,199 ...neither of us are getting any younger. 652 00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:33,159 Eyes fail, reflexes go and, frankly, 653 00:26:33,160 --> 00:26:35,520 your driving's bloody awful. 654 00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:38,360 I worry you're going to kill someone. 655 00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:40,800 Probably yourself. 656 00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:43,559 And... 657 00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:47,959 ...as it turns out, I would rather have you alive than a big house, 658 00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:50,399 so it's a no. 659 00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:51,759 No, Mummy. 660 00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:54,759 Amanda... Mummy, I have said my piece, I have thought about it, I... 661 00:26:54,760 --> 00:26:56,160 Amanda, thank you... 662 00:26:57,960 --> 00:27:00,079 ...for not wanting me dead. 663 00:27:00,080 --> 00:27:01,839 Not many mothers could say that. 664 00:27:01,840 --> 00:27:02,999 Mu... 665 00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:06,199 I lightly brushed into a one-way suggestion today... 666 00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:07,439 Sign, yeah. 667 00:27:07,440 --> 00:27:10,799 ...so I think the time has come for me to admit 668 00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:13,039 that my driving days are behind me... 669 00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:15,760 Mummy... ..so I've taken the points, they've taken my licence. 670 00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:17,799 And... 671 00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:18,840 OK. 672 00:27:20,360 --> 00:27:21,479 What's this? 673 00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:24,159 Valuation on this place. 674 00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:28,959 I'm selling it to free up the money, so I can put an offer in on... 675 00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:30,159 Dead cat lady. 676 00:27:30,160 --> 00:27:31,359 Elspeth's. ..Elspeth's! 677 00:27:31,360 --> 00:27:34,239 Mummy... I don't know what to say! 678 00:27:34,240 --> 00:27:35,359 But where will you live? 679 00:27:35,360 --> 00:27:37,199 Well, with you! 680 00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:38,839 In our new house! 681 00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:41,359 Oh! Oh, darling! 682 00:27:41,360 --> 00:27:42,400 FELICITY CHUCKLES 683 00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:45,640 AMANDA GASPS AND CHUCKLES